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birthday week [09 Jun 2018|04:22pm]
aside from my grandma calling today instead of tomorrow my birthday has been mellow. this made me cry because it's the first time she's legitimately forgot. she's getting progressively worse and it's killing me inside because i dont know what to do.

i still miss you and think of you every day. i'm glad you're happy though. sincerely.

i hope i find someone that makes me as happy as touring does. realistically it won't happen. but some real affection and intimacy would be nice.

the tour's been really nice. people ask and value my opinion which is different. people include me in decisions and consider me when they're doing things. we got so much free food that i'm still full. the shows have been really good. all the band guys have been so sweet. watching famous people eat muffins with a fork at 4am is something i won't forget though.
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why [09 Jun 2018|11:16pm]

WHY DO I FEEL SO SAD RIGHT NOW

I'm where i want to be with good people

I'm full of food

so why

why does my heart sink

then I'm like oh..it's my first birthday without my grandpa

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